The Dating Game

Alright yall, this post is going to be vain and full of selfies because I’m gonna talk about dating today! dun dun dunnn! It’s an area of my life I haven’t been the most successful in as of late, which is weird because I had boyfriends in high school and they were all great catches at the time, and to be honest I find myself to be a pretty good catch. Where did I take a wrong turn? Haha Maybe I can start by not weighing too much on my adolescent relationships because life is different now and I’m not looking for the same qualities in a man that I was then, and I know more what I want now than I did then.

I have only been on two dates in my life. I don’t count the dates with people I’m already in a relationship with, which until about six years ago was the case. Thankfully I have not been single that whole time, I’d go crazy! I’m a relationship person, I’m just happier in a relationship. Two of those six years were wasted spent on guys who refused to commit to an exclusive relationship, but out of loneliness and love for the other, I stayed. But I decided wasted shouldn’t be a good word for my time spent because I did learn what I didn’t want from dating those two guys.

I should point out I’ve never had a serious relationship in my life, I’ve never even been able to hold a relationship for a year; so this kind of worries me because if I ever get married, I’d like to be with someone for a few years first, and I wanted to get married younger. Well, life doesn’t care about what you want.

I think my number one problem is the way I meet guys, obviously we all know meeting a guy in a bar usually ends up in failure. I haven’t figured out the exact science of it, but people meeting drunk in bars usually ends up one way, not the way I’m down with. I also tried online dating but was too chicken shit to ever actually go out on a date, so I don’t even know that I could say I tried it. That’s my problem, I’m a nervous nelly, I get so anxiety ridden that I talk myself out of things before I can even start them and just bail all together. So finally, I got set up by a good friend and tried a first date. Man was I NERVOUS before hand, I’m not even sure if it was the guy or my anxiety but I thought I was gonna puke. Thankfully, once it got started I was comfortable and it went well. Unfortunately after that I was just turned off by some things the guy did in the days to come so that fizzled out and we never went on a second date.

The second first date I went on I think most people would have a red flag from the beginning but I’m a nice person who gives people chances, even the wrong people. The red flag should’ve been that he only hit on me because my hotter best friend rejected him first. But he was cute and so darn persistent so I finally went out with him; which also went well. We talked almost every day for like 3 weeks and for the past few days it’s starting to fizzle out, and it’s because of me, talking myself out of things again. He asked for a second date several times and I said yes, but I bailed when it finally came down to it. I can’t even figure out why but I guess I figured I must not be that into him if I keep wanting to find excuses not to go. So another one bites the dust.

I thought having a pretty good idea of my perfect guy would help me find a dude better, but it makes you a lot more picky and finding a man a lot harder. Not every guy is going to be tall, dark, handsome, manly and a gentleman among the other qualities I have cooked up in my brain.

Another big problem I have is being shallow; I have no problem admitting that physical attraction is very important to me. I can’t/won’t date you if I don’t find you attractive, sorry I’m not sorry. The reason it’s a big problem is because I literally ONLY get asked out by guys who I’m not attracted to. What gives? This is just the way of the world for me I think. So after pondering the situation way too much, I’m a big thinker, I realized that the right man has not yet been plopped in front of me yet because I have a lot of work to do on myself. I struggle with insecurity, lack of confidence and depression. (Yes that’s not going to be apparent with all the selfies, but hey, I’m trying to promote myself here!) So my motto has been “who’s gonna love you, if you don’t love you.” Someday I’ll get that confidence locked in where is supposed to be (almost there!) and I’ll have my depression under control (also almost there!) and the right guy is going to see how amazing I am and swoon and sweep me off my feet. Yup, that’s how it’s ending.

Should I give you guys a short faux dating profile “about me”? Sure!

I’m 5’5”, curvy/athletic with strawberry blonde hair. I have the biggest heart you’ll ever find, I’m a great listener, I love to laugh till my stomach hurts, and I love to play sports, volleyball being my favorite. If I could be reincarnated into anything, it would be a fish because I love the water; nothing makes me happier than being on the lake, unless its laughing till my abs hurt on the lake. I work full time at a good job, own my own car and live with roommates in the city.

See, what a catch! Now here’s some selfies because physical appearance matters, I don’t care who you are. If you like someone for their personality that’s a double bonus, but I’ll bet you didn’t get there before deciding they were cute.

 

Annnd a cute article about why you should should date a Mid-Westerner... (im from Michigan) and these are all accurate!

http://dating.redeyechicago.com/date-report/23-reasons-to-date-a-midwesterner/#


Have a fantastic day yall! Hope you enjoyed this post and as always don’t be too shy to request anything you’d like to read about in the future!